This is my long journey of reclaiming my voice. It started when I was about 10.

I was in fourth grade, near the end of the school year. For our graduation ceremony, our teacher asked us to write a speech about our primary school experience. Little did I know this moment would begin my journey of losing and eventually reclaiming my authentic voice.

I poured my heart into it. I wrote about the joy of friendships, the challenges of learning tough lessons together, and how much we’d grown over the past four years.

When I read it to her, my teacher had tears in her eyes.
Pride swelled in my chest.

But my joy quickly turned to shock, when I learnt someone else will deliver my speech: the boy in the class known as “the smartest.” I, on the other hand, was assigned to read his speech.

“You speak too softly”, the teacher explained when I worked out the courage to ask why. “This speech is the best, and I want to make sure everyone hears it properly.”

At the ceremony, I robotically recited his words, while he spoke my thoughts and emotions.
I had never felt so silenced and invisible.
The applause that followed felt both foreign and entirely mine.

I went home with a wounded soul, vowing to never let anyone take my voice or put someone else’s words in my mouth again.

I wish I could say that was the last time that happened to me.

The Long Journey to Reclaiming Your Authentic Voice

Countless times since, I’ve let myself be silenced, by fear, by shame, be self-doubt. And every time, the pain was just as raw.

Even now, I often choose silence when I have something to say. Sometimes, it’s fear that holds me back. Other times, I feel my opinion doesn’t matter or I get drowned out by louder, more confident voices. Each time I chose silence, I stray further from my authentic voice, letting fear dictate my expression.

I know my voice matters, even when it trembles.
I know no one has the right to dictate it’s pace or volume.
And yet, sometimes I trip over those same childhood insecurities.

But I keep fighting. Step by step, I’m learning to reclaim my voice and not to let anyone – not even myself –  take it away. 

Now, writing is my way of reclaiming my authentic voice. And it deserves to be heard, no matter how “softly” I speak it. This journey taught me that finding and maintaining my authentic voice is a continuous process – one worth fighting for.